My New Book


AdoptyMum and Co. look like a normal family. So why is she getting uptight when someone offers her son a biscuit? Why is that angelic little girl suddenly shouting at the bus driver?

This is the story of what happens when you can’t give birth to children of your own, and you take on kids whose start in life has been … difficult.

Join AdoptyMum for a bumpy, scary, life-changing and rewarding ride

What Folk Think!!

“…this book fits firmly on the shelf for ‘must read’ books about adoption…”

There are many books on adoption for prospective adopters, and this book fits firmly on the shelf for ‘must read’ books about adoption. This adoption story adds an approach that is humorous, hopeful and honest. Elena tracks her journey from first thoughts about adoption through five years and looking forward. As an adoptive parent, I recognised many of her descriptions and feelings, but I wish I had had her sense of humour and energy.

The book follows the journey from the pain of learning about infertility – I was also told to ‘come to terms with my infertility before adopting a child’ – making the adoption application, through to her experiences with other mothers whose conversations centred on child birth and baby stages of development. From school challenges, surviving travelling and holidays to celebrations of progress and developing attachments. Throughout the story, there is clear evidence that Elena has read widely herself, used her training and experience of working with children as a teacher, and opened her heart and mind to new approaches with a discerning streak as to whether these approaches are appropriate for her ‘Adopty’ family.

Throughout the book are tips and points of interest that come from research as well as from her experience. I would love some of these researchers to read this book to see how their expert advice is put into practice. They might find new ideas and enjoy the expressions of hope Elena conveys. It is a book of hope, fun, joy, at times pain and confusion but always bouncing back to hope. It is a book about developing Adopty-Resilience. Something all adopters, friends and family of adopters and school staff need. I have known Elena and her familythrough some of this journey, and thank you Elena for this very readable, enjoyable and personal account of your life as an Adoptyparent.

The explanations of how the children see things, and why they react as they do, are well described and helpful

‘Adoptymum’ is a really well written book.  It is honest, heartfelt, painful, and funny.  I started reading and couldn’t put it down.
It is the story of one mum’s ( and adoptydad’s) journey into adoptive parenting, it’s joys, embarrassments, trials and sheer survival. With an underlying theme of love for and commitment to their children whatever the pressures. I suspect many adoptive parents would see a lot of their own feelings and story in it.
The explanations of how the children see things, and why they react as they do, are well described and helpful. I would recommend this book to anyone interested in adoption.

…an essential read for anyone planning to adopt.

I would say this is an essential read for anyone planning to adopt and for approved adopters waiting to be placed with a child – an honest authentic account of the early years.

Truly great book… Would love another as a follow-up

Truly a great book.  I would like to think that all teachers and parents would read and understand the traumas for AdoptyFamilies.  I read it in one go!! Would love another as a follow-up!

Just started it… Didn’t want to put it down.

I read it with tears in my eyes whilst also laughing

I have really enjoyed reading your book AdoptyMum.

I read it with tears in my eyes whilst also laughing.  It feels really genuine and the experiences were painted so clearly that it made me really feel part of your AdoptyFamily.  I believe it teaches adoptive parents and any parents for that matter to just accept their children as they are, hoping for the best and trying anything to make them build a more secure, positive relationship.  It also teaches parents to accept that parenting children in a way that meets their needs will not always be seen in a positive light by the others such as friends or other parents but that this is part and parcel of caring for children in a way that promotes their needs rather than pleasing the others.

I believe that anybody who is or has been touched by adoption should read this book as it is refreshing whilst also passing on knowledge and really useful experiences.

Thank you, I personally found it really useful.

…it’s well written with humour, but touches the heart.

I can wholeheartedly recommend this book, written by a friend.  I related to it so well, that for the first time in, well forever, I read the whole book in one day.  I really couldn’t put it down.  I think it’s well written with humour, but touches the heart.  The book is so easy to read, and even if you aren’t an AdoptyMum it gives you such a lovely insight and perhaps a better understanding at the end of it.  Well done Elena Holmes, can’t wait for the next one!!

…a good read and told the story perfectly with lots of honesty and humour.

I read this book in one day!  It was such a good read and told the story perfectly with lots of honesty and humour.  I have worked in childcare for many years and definitely found it insightful and very useful and would definitely recommend this book to anyone who is looking into adoption or working in childcare.  Well done!


I highly recommend this book for adults involved in parenthood.

AdoptyMum is guide on surviving parenthood and raising good kids along the way.

Whilst a true tale of the authors experience of adoption, I related to the many situations in raising my own non-adopted children. Elena Holmes has done a fantastic job in sharing her experiences with honesty and humour, showing how caring for, loving and raising children is mixture of hard work, mess, love, laughs and sometime plain old crazy fun.

Juggling kids, work, school, kids sports, activities, marriage and life can seem hard – and reading this you know that you are not alone, others feel the same joys and stress in trying to manage it all, and it doesn’t always go to plan. I enjoyed the “how to” aspects of the book – practical advice and examples of how the author handled situations with her children’s school, friends, food, behaviour, and some really important areas like trust, respect, boundaries and love.

I highly recommend this book for adults involved in parenthood – adoption, natural, blended, single, mixed, extended… it’s great informative, funny and insightful.

Adopting children is never easy


AdoptyMum by Elena Holmes

I enjoyed the honesty of the book. Adopting children is never easy. You can anticipate all the problems in the world before you adopt and think about how to challenge them but the issues in reality are often the ones not thought of! This story demonstrates this. It was interesting and readable. I enjoyed discovering how the children had grown and how the family had grown with them, modifying their approach to each new challenge as it arose. The absolute love these parents have for their children overrides everything throughout the book. I look forward to the teenage sequel!


It’s certainly a book we will be recommending

ADOPTY MUM – A survival Guide to life with Adopted Kids

By Elena Holmes

As a part of preparing new prospective adopters for the journey ahead we are always looking for books written by adopters who can “say it as it is” and this is certainly one of those books. Reality, knowledge and experience is there but alongside humour.  It’s certainly a book we will be recommending to our new applicants as well as those who have been adopting for a while – as a reminder that it’s OK to feel all those different emotions and different challenges along the way. As a professional – the way in which the whole process is described – meets my approval wholeheartedly.

… you covered so many issues really well and gave a real reflection of what life is like for your family.

I thoroughly enjoyed reading Adoptymum. It took me back to so many conversations that we have had in the past about different scenarios and events that you mentioned in the book.

I could almost hear your voice when I was reading it as it felt like you were in the room talking to me!

It was a very heartfelt book, sad in places but with lots of humour. I thought that you covered so many issues really well and gave a real reflection of what life is like for your family. I imagine that you found it quite cathartic, getting a few things off of your chest along the way.

I am so proud to have been alongside you on your journey as an Adoptymum and proud of you and Adoptydad for producing the book and for all that you have achieved as parents to two children who without you would have likely had a much less positive future.

I wish you all the very best and I look forward to reading the next book!